Swansea Escort Abby

Those of you paying attention will note my site is undergoing an image change. Not being the most computer literate person, I am still playing about with inserting pictures and getting them to sit where I want them to sit. I have this morning had a one way argument with the computer;  ’I said the middle of the page! The middle damn you… THE MIDDLE…..’  It’s not playing ball so until I have had more coffee and opened the blinds a bit to let in some sunshine (Yes, I said sunshine, that yellow ball that lives in the sky is shining and it’s somewhat thrown me off as I was expecting grey skies and drizzle, again. Not sure my eyes can take the glare of it after so much time without, so am being cautious and breaking them in gently!)

Many thanks to my web lady who managed to fit in my requests while running goodness knows how many other successful businesses!  Flowers, I said, give me flowers! I love flowers!

Unfortunately I alone am responsible for editing content. I am of the school of thought that, if it’s hard, coffee is needed plus a break every 10 minutes: Otherwise frustration might lead to my computer living in the shed, alone, unloved and unplugged for eternity while I slowly pull my hair out from it’s roots and wonder why God saw fit to not bestow technical genius upon me. I don’t argue with him too often, I mean, the Great Man gave me a pair of boobs to die for so what’s to row about really? I guess I am more your creative person than your technical person…

I will slowly work it all out and the site will be top notch before you know it so bear with me….

 

I have a friend in Heathrow – Alexandra. She works in this business and is a bit of a posh bird really.

You know how we Welsh girls talk? It’s all very down to earth and when we hear an English person pick up the phone, well, when I hear Alex pick up the phone I can’t help it, she is just so posh sounding! She goes: ‘Oh, hi Abby, how are youuuu?’ Very posh tone, very upper class…. Hysterical!

We Welsh go ‘Alright? Everything good?’ (We don’t all say ‘what’s occurring’ well, not if we can help it now…..) All jolly and friendly and well, normal (expecting a backlash from all English persons – please don’t, I think your great actually, if I throw in a few Welsh words it’s only for sport and to confuse you! It’s hardly my fault we play better rugby and have lots of sheep, is it!!!)

Anyhow, Alex was in her car and I called her. We were chatting away: when suddenly Alex goes;

 ’Oh, Hi Abby, how are youuuu? Oh excellent! Oh, oh god! Oh noooo! There is a man urinating across the road from me! Oh honestly, really in public?! No! That is terribly disgusting…. I should say something to him….’

Can you imagine Alex here in Wales, getting that window down and shouting out in her posh accent ‘Excuse me young man! You! Yes, you there…. Hello, how are youuuuu? I was wondering Sir, would you mind awfully not urinating in public? That is a nice clean wall there (waggling her impeccably manicured hand at the wall) do you think you could find a public lavatory Sir? You do? Oh, that’s great, thank you so much. You have a lovely day now!’

Ha! I do love Alex….. When I told her people pee in the sea here she was outraged. I don’t think she will ever dip a toe in the shores off Wales again!

I believe I read in the local paper this week that a lap dancing club was in for planning permission and a local vicar was strongly opposing it? Well, he would, I guess…. I don’t see the harm in it actually, well, I wouldn’t really so I shall watch with interest the outcome of this.

People get so hot under the collar about all things ‘sex’ related, even a nod towards something being a touch ‘sexy’ gets opinions flying faster than I would hop on a plane and fly to Italy if I got the chance and I would hop on that plane  fast, believe me!

I for one hope it arrives. People do enjoy sex, people do enjoy the titillation of it all. There is no harm in it as long as the people involved are reasonably level headed and grown up! I am taking a wild guess that the vicor would see more tits and arse and blatant sex on display if he took a walk down Wind Street one weekend night than he will ever see on show in a lap dancing club! I was collecting a friend from a night out back when we had out heatwave and the young ladies walking that street, oh, did I say walking? Sorry, I mean stumbling, the young ladies stumbling about that street at 1am were wearing possibly the same amount of clothing as a lap dancer yet without an inch of a lap dancers charm and class… I did not think too much of the ritual of being sick at the side of the curb either! God above, really? Get a grip girls!

Go home and put some clothes on! Get a pair of shoes you can actually walk in not those sky scrapper high things your holding in your hand due to the fact you couldn’t walk in them while sober let alone plastered three hours later and trying to stop the pavement from swaying back and forth! Perhaps we need a school for these young girls where we teach them to walk in these shoes? There is nothing to it really, it only requires balance and trickery and oh, about 7 double vodka’s less!? Ah.., here speaks an obviously mature lady and not a bright eyed 19 year old? Those days are gone for me I am afraid, I get my kicks behind closed doors not down the alleyway of a pub, behind a parked car while stammering ‘I don’t have any condoms….’ Yep, I heard that also that night! Had I had my own with me, I would have helped the young man out with one or two, but really, they saw me there as well you know, twiddling my car keys about while I waited on my friend and I swear to God, they acted as if it was a normal thing to be doing, the fact I was stood there looking possibly appalled did nothing to stop the young man’s girlfriend whipping out a boob or two – I moved on at that point, I had seen enough, heard enough…. Hysterical.

xxx